And WHAT an event it was!
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We go all we had wanted though.
A nice dinner, a room, to be out of the house, and some excitement.
Only thing we hadn't planned on was fulfilling our plans at the local ER.
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We went to dinner at a small italian place, enjoyed a great meal, and each other.
after dinner we had planned to come home, start up the fire, and just enjoy what we have.
simple enough right?
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when we got home, I started having horrible cramps.
within the hour, those horrible cramps turned into pain comparable to birthing labor.
I was literally curled up on the floor screaming.
the pain would come hard and sharp, then ease into a low throb.
I also learned that if i kept my left leg pulled up into my body, it was not as bad.
but if i moved that leg, all hell opened in my gut.
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poor Hubby didn't know what to do.
I occassionally get cysts, and he asked if that was it- in which case it would pass on its own, not much we can do about it. I couldn't even answer him ,I was in so much pain.
Should i take you to the hospital?
oh GODNO!
(our hospital leaves MUCH to be desired, and if you have a deathwish, this is the place to go.)
He waited another 5 minutes and asked if he should call an ambulance-
jeez i dunno...
can you make it to the other hospital?(a two hour drive.)
NO
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He finally couldn't stand it anymore, and I couldn't answer him. he got me up off the floor and to the truck, and how he drove with me screaming, I'll never know.
Got me to the local ER- more mega pain in the parking lot-
they kept making me walk, and it was killing me.
finally one of the nurses called or a wheelchair.
Hubby ended up signing me in becasue i was curled into a ball in the chair, with my blanket over my head, just groaning.
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when the doc came to see me, He gave me phenegran, and then took about a gallon of blood from me- once the phenegran kicked in things got weird.
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I don't take medication on a regular basis- so I'm considered a lightweight. I kid you not, a shot of nyquil puts me out not only for the night, but most of the next day. this phenegran bout put me into a coma.
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then i had to answer questions.
Because of where the pain was, the number one question was "when was your last period?"
I couldn't help but laugh, and because i couldn't talk, all i'd say is NO.
baffled them to no end.
I'd had a procedure done last year- which long story short, put an end to my periods.
so since that glorious day I haven't had to even THINK of a period. The word seems alien to me.
Husband explained it, becasue even in the pain all i could do is laugh.
he said it was like watching beevis n butthead- "hehehehe you said period hehee"
jeez.
*following the comedy show, they said they'd do xrays, find out whats going on in there, obviously pregnancy not being an issue.
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this is where I lost my first 2 hours to the phenegran.
I closed my eyes for two seconds, and all of a sudden its almost 11pm.
when I opened them again,the nurse was begging me to get up onto a table for my xrays.
I was able to do it without much pain.(thaaank you phenny!)
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I lost another 30 minutes and woke again in the exam room.
The doc came in with a stunned look on his face.
"when was your last BM?"
huh? Idunno. day before yesterday.
his eyes got big, and he said, "ma'am, never in my years of being a doctor have I seen so MUCH poop inside one person."
I sat up and looked at Husband "WHAT the hell did he just say to me?!"
Husband says "he said you're full of sh!t"
(remember i was doped and not in my right mind, getting defensive was autopilot)
"ok doc so you're telling my my bowels are exploding or what? you think i'm FAKING this?!"
"no ma'am. I'm convinced you are in alot of pain. and you very well should be."
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turns out, somehow my bowels compacted, and I had a falopian cyst trying to make an escape.
my compacted bowels kept said cyst form moving far- the pain was the cyst trying to push THROUGH my compacted bowels.
could have fooled me! It felt like the whole works were trying to claw out through my belly button.
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Like I said, theres nothing to be done for the cyst, it has to move on its own. The doc advised me to go home and move my bowels- which wouldn't be as difficult now because the phenny was blocking the pain. And he was right.
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As of this entry, the cyst is still in there, but I can feel it moving better now- the cramping is minimal, and I'm sure it won't be much longer.
I've also consumed a generous amount of stool softener.
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so... the tally.
one dinner : great food.
one room : courtesy of our local ER
some excitement: I think the screaming pain covers that
out of the house : yea. ER for 5 hours .
anniversary : still good- My husband never left my side, and made sure i was taken care of by a hospital known for misdiagnosis and screwups- scared the hell out of him, but he made sure i was safe .
even in horrendous pain, we somehow managed to laugh through it together.
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but I thank my lucky stars that we had kept the plans for the kids' sitter.
only in my world.
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