"You Should Try Wal-Mart. "

People who know me well, have learned to not say "the W place" around me anymore. Yet there are times, when this seems the most logical response.

I have to admit, I planned to blog this months ago, and decided, giving it a little time to actually become amusing would be a better plan , rather than raging it out of my system.

Daughter wears glasses, which she's needed since she was under a year old. Several surgeries and much "anal retentive" care of her eyes have done wonders for her vision.

She's always been very responsible for her glasses, even at 18months old, she knew when to take them off, how to set them down, and learned how to clean them herself.

During the last month of school this year, there was a mixup with the glasses. She had wanted to hang upside down on the monkey bars, and handed them to a pal while she did so. No blame will be placed here, as on the playground , in the midst of rushed recess fun, things get forgotten.

In short, the glasses were lost. The first vanished set in 10 years, I couldn't be hard on her about it. She felt bad enough as it was.

Off we go to her eye Dr. , for an exam and new glasses. I'm told that since our last visit, said DR has dropped our insurance plan. WHAT?! not good news at all. This puts the cost of the visit way out of my budget.

I also found out that our insurance plan was being moved to a different company, and haha joke on me, the eye DR won't take that either. This insurance change left us with no coverage for 2 months. REALLY not good.

Because Daughter needs her glasses, for reading ,as well as distances, it is all imperative we have this done.

We inquire with the DR how much this will run us. We figure since we have to pay full price out of pocket, no limits on what kind of frames or lenses, we'll go quality for her.
This would have cost us over $300, with her optomologist.

Not happening.

Completely distressed with how on earth we'll do this, bills are due, event costs coming, I ask around.

Only 2 of my pals were brave enough to suggest the Wal-mart eye center. And yes, I groaned and moaned about it.

I made the call. . . And this folks, is where my fun began.

The Eye center phone rang and rang and rang. no answer in the middle of the day?
I call the main store line. . . and get connected , and answered. (?!?!)

I ask about the frames and lenses we'd like for her. I'm told the cost will be roughly $130.

Wow ! ok. Guess that's the way we're going ! ( Yet in my mind, there is that little anti-walmart nag- how BADLY will this go? how many people will get hurt in the process??)

Off we go. When we arrive, there is one woman in the eye center.
"can i help you?"

I sure hope so, we need to get my girl's glasses done.

"Is there anything specific you're looking for ?"

Yes, as a matter of fact there is. We'd like to do titanium frames (to last a bit longer) and have the transition tinting on her lenses ( because if she swaps her glasses for sunglasses, she can't see)

"ok, well, here are our youth titanium frames, see what she likes and let me know"

we tried on these youth frames, and NONE of them fit her head properly. She's reached that awkward stage between youth and adult sizes.

I ask the woman if the youth frames can be adjusted, and she says " no, not the titanium ones"
Then she continues on to the next rack of frames- which are not titanium, and I could be mistaken, but I swear they could have been designed by Lady GaGa.

She hands my daughter a set of frames which are neon green, with a huge plastic daisy on one arm. "Try these on honey"

I tell her " don't you dare, you are NOT getting those."

the woman replies with " oh Mom, but they're FUN! they look great on her"

I Look at her, give her a touch of the old "zapparoo" eyeball glare. " no, she looks like a freak of nature. Besides that she's 10 years old- are YOU going to pay for these, and then pay for the complete wardrobe of clothing and shoes to match these nasty things?"

woman steps back. . . wisely. "well, I , um..."

" so, you asked what we're looking for, and I told you. I cannot afford to change the plan from a $60 frame to a $98 set of freaky Lady GaGa frames because you have a fun flower fetish. Do you have any larger TITANIUM frames in the store?"

"well yes, um... over here in the women's racks. "

thank you.

We meander over to the woman's rack- and I had Daughter try on the titanium frames, which were ridiculously huge. The child looks like a crazed owl.

I ask the woman again, if there are any other sizes we could try, IN the titanium frames.

she pulls out a set , again, NOT titanium, and they are huge, an assorted color of red green and purple, and physically puts them onto my child." well, THOSE are adorable !"

"not for $120 just for those ugly frames. Lady, would you put those on YOUR kid to send to school? really? "

"um uuuh"

I didn't think so.

She walks away from me, and vanishes into a back room to leave us to our reasonable and highly frustrating search.

Daughter looks at me and says " Mama , I don't think she's listening to you. I heard you tell her what we want, why does she keep putting those ugly things on me?"
I said "because this is WalMart honey. "
"oooh."
sad when the 10 year old understands.

10 more minutes of infuriating searching and sizing, and there are no frames to fit this child in youth or women's wear. I am considering, at this point a way to quickly earn the $300 for the optomologist, or even a 2 hour drive to a major city with a walmart that has a decent selection.

The vision Tech comes out, and asks if we've been helped yet. " sure if that's what you call it."
"well, what are you looking for?"

go through the spiel again. simply as possible, just in case. "titanium frames and transition lenses- but there doesn't seem to be any frames here that fit her head."

"hmmm. did you try the men's rack?"

No we haven't. . . so we do, and the very first set of frames she picks up, not only FITS Daughter, but we agree that they look nice on her. Just like that. we have frames.

Get the order in, and go to pay for it. comes to $190 ish. (due to the difference in youth/adult frames- but still do-able)

The register will not accept my card.
" for some reason we've had trouble with these, you'll have to do it manually, it usually works that way."
I kid you not people- the woman told me she didn't know HOW to enter it manually, could i come back when the manager was in the next day ?!

will you send the order ?

no. we'll have to cancel it, but I'll keep it here so when you come in we just enter the code number and that will send it.

whatever. ok. just get me out of here now.

We return the next day, have to wait 30 min for the manager to answer the page just by phone, wait another 10 minutes for him to appear with something else to do, and he almost left the vision center before running my card. I had to stop him myself , even after he talked to the woman at the register!

finally its in. she tells me it will be a week to 10 days !!! ( my poor girl is having problems. she's been without her glasses for almost 2 weeks now, migrane's, eye strain, and we are seeing her eyes pull again, which is what the surgeries were to have corrected , along with the glasses. seeing the regression was not a happy thing) poor kid about cried right there, knowing she'd have to wait another week. "I'm so sorry baby, but I don't have the money to go somewhere else to do it faster" broke my heart.

but she's a trooper. She made it, and they called us on pickup in only 4 days.

pickup was MUCH more pleasant. and faster.

people, really. I wasn't kidding when I say EVERY time I go to this store its unbelievably tortuous.