Mom's Turn !!

I may have mentioned this before, my Son (6 1/2) is somewhat quirky. He has physical sensitivities, and several ocd issues that change as much as the weather. he takes every word very literally.

Some days, these are amusing quirks- like when he explodes indians in the basement.

other days, well, not so much.
Like when it takes 2 hours to put ONE sock on six times because the seams rub his toes.
or when we go through trying on every pair of jeans he owns 10 minutes before the bus arrives.

No doubt, thats my boy, he is who he is. we deal with the quirks, we laugh at the funnies, we stay extremely patient in the wirlwind of meltdowns.

This very morning, Son had a meltdown. several actually. Though they tend to come and blend into the next so quickly its diffiicult to tell where on ends and the next begins.

We started with a salad of "which jeans to wear". (I learned to make sure he gets dressed FIRST on a school day, before anything else. he's usually up early anyway) too dark, too long, those are church pants, those are too itchy, these too hard to button.
I keep my cool, go through the motions and finally we find jeans he'll wear. whew!

the appetizer is a breakfast crisis. the boy has forgotten where the spoons are, and is YELLING about it, while touching every one of them in the drawer. . . what ?!
yes.

for entree' , the major delimma was getting him to leave the dog alone. on nice mornings I walk her with us to the bus. she looks forward to it, and on days I don't take her, has her own form of meltdown. this morning was one of the latter. foggy and wet out,no way. we're driving to the bus. sorry gal. the kids know that playing with her before we leave her is a no-no in a big way.
once he knew we weren't taking her today, the boy had her going. running figure eights around the couch at full speed.
sigh.
I put the dog outside, find the NASA channel to amuse the kid for the 5 minutes before we leave for the bus.

ah yes. dessert. I getthe kids' snacks for school ready, a baggie of popcorn each. son flips out in a big way. "i HATE popcorn!!"
um, not the last time you ate it.
"well I do!! it smells bad!"
oookay then boy, what is it you'd like?
cookies.
call me bad for trying, but fine, take the cookies.

off to the bus. WHEW!

I got to thinking about how the particulars of these meltdowns change, and how suggesting solutions almost seems offensive sometimes. how on earth do I show him what its like to be on this side?

I decided it was mommy's turn to have silly meltdowns.
I decided I don't want anything to do with the color black today. don't want to touch it, walk on it, feel it, smell it taste it, nothing. I planned to use the same complaints I hear, being silly (so as to not be hurtful !) but to get the point across - yes I understand the Quirks, but this is what you do to me, a little help?"

I met the kids at the bus wearing the same black shirt i wore this am. and rubbed and pulled at it all the way home, tugging at the tag, grunting and moaning. dumb ol itchy fuzzy black.

son gives me a weird look. says nothing.

when we get home, I avoid the black area rugs in the kitchen and dining room. now Daughter is giving me looks.
more rubbing and grunting and pulling.

when i poured coffee into a mug with black trim, and held the mug oh, so carefully so as not to touch the black, Daughter asks "mom? is your mug broken?"

"no. it has black on it."

more looks. they are thinking about it now. Son has an odd lopsided grin on his face. I think he may be onto me.

I step on a brown strip of rug to get to the chair.
rub the shirt some more.

Daughter asks if they can go out n ride bikes.

"um, uh, i dunno if we should really, if i go out the sun makes this shirt more fuzzy." (its a cotton Tshirt!)
what?

at that moment the giant black and brown dog decides to put her two cents in and lick me.
"eeek! " i run to the sink and scrub.

Son has it now. its funny. those big ol browns are watching and waiting for whats next.

daughter says " whats wrong with black?? "

I tell her I don't like it anymore. Black smells funny.
Son giggles. quick quiet little giggle.

Daughter tells me to change me shirt.
"noooo! then i have to do more laundry!!"
but we want to go OUT Mom!!

but i'll be sooo itchy! its like red ants biting and burning and the fuzzies are so itchy!!

Daughter gets up and goes to the bedroom.

Son comes to me and says "oh Mom, i'm wearing black pants, and i'm gonna hug you so big it'll be fine. "
cute, but not working boy.
i get my big ol hug, and commence to itching my legs.
he holds my arms.

Daughter return wit ha green shirt from my dresser.

I go into a panic ,yelling and whining "but i CAN'T wear THAT one !! its GREEN!"

yea mom, its not black. just put it on so we can go out.

"BUT GREEN TASTES LIKE ORANGE AND I WON'T WEAR IT!!!

hehe we all have a giggle, and even as i'm giggling , i prepare to throw myself on the floor.

Son gets in front of me again and says " Mama, you just have to go in there and find a shirt you WILL wear to take us outside then. "
He says this in exactly the same tone I use on him. the exact words I use on him as well.

then, he stands with hands on hips, and says " mama, we really do want to go out, pleeease go find a good shirt. we'll even wait, but hurry ok?"

stinker playin me like a fiddle.

although, since this little adventure began, he has been catching himself from throwing more meltdowns at me . . . today anyway.

this is the stuff that keeps the nuthouse in biz.

yet another fun "dumb moment" !

Son and I are channel surfing. We are trying to find a movie, because Sister is not feeling good. We thought it would be a nice surprise.

Sister is engaged in some activity in the bedroom while we surf, quietly, probably reading or sketching.

We come across a jewel. "Avatar" is just starting on HBO.
Sister says she'll join us soon ( although it is one of her favorites, she has seen it , ALOT)

Son and I watch roughly a half hour.

I got up to refresh my coffee, and it was like walking into a wall.

"thats IT! "

something just hadn't clicked until I got up.

We were watching the movie in spanish.

And watched a half hour before we noticed !!

so, for giggles and our own cheesy amusement, we called to Sister- "its your favorite part!"

she came out, and we wondered if she'd notice, or just 'hear' it from memory.

she noticed. . . immediately.

We felt pretty goofy.

fun with an oral surgoen

Yes, it DOES say fun with an oral surgeon. . .and his nurse,actually.

I have an issue with my teeth, many are broken, and in short, there are only 15 left. thats 5 on the bottom, 10 very sensitive on top. makes it difficult to eat, and its not very attractive. For a woman who works with children, its really not fitting in. So the mission is to fix this. get rid of the 15, and pop in some falsies. I'm good with that. I like to eat. (and smile)

Off to see the oral surgeon !

I am not ashamed to start my appointment by telling him I have an aversion to dentists. "It's nothing personal aginst any one dentist, Its more against the aftereffects. " you know, the week of horrid pain from my face. (example, I had 5 teeth pulled at once, it felt like child labor in my head)
The OS replies by telling me he DOES take it personally, but hey, thanks for sharing so honestly.

well. he took that well.

they do my xray- it turns out to be a solid scan of the front of my face, from my nose to my chin. This is to get a clear idea of where my sinuses are, because they'll be working on the upper front.

When they put the xray on the lightbox, I had to laugh. " wow. that is the scariest fish I've ever seen!"
priceless.
Both the OS and nurse look at me like I've gone mad, look at the xray, and yes, even tilt thier heads. the nurse sees it first- " oooh my, yea I guess it is. thats a first.no one's ever said THAT before. "
I am still not sure if the OS actually saw it. "um yea, how odd"

As we go on, we go through my history- OS is amazed I've not been hospitalized for anything besides childbirth. It was all outpatient or ER. " no broken bones, no illness, you're pretty healthy for your age."
for my age?? "well of course- I still claim 25."
Ha! He double checks his chart, does the math again. "o hhh, haaahaa" this guys really quick.

moving on. we go through the motions of going over the drill, (pardon the pun) he tells me all i need to know and all he'll do to me if I allow him in my mouth.

Checking the chart again he tells the nurse he needs my blood pressure. I have low blood pressure. He needs a 'normal' reading from me so he knows when he tries to put me under hes' not going to kill me.
Fair enough.

I give this nurse the same warning I do all the nurses who ever took my blood pressure.

" good luck. its REALLY low. most of my nurses end up mad because they can't find it."

this one, she dooesn't go for it.(though I am serious) " oh no way. all my years at this, I have never had that problem"

"ok, seriously, they're tried to send me to the ER. One had me do jumping jacks. "

She stops and looks at me. "well thats just rediculous "

ok. don't say i didn't try to warn you.

We go to a room, she puts the cuff on. pumps it up- the AUTOMATIC machine, can't find my blood pressure.
hmm "well the cuff's too big for your little arm. thats all."

yup, sure . thats all.

smaller cuff. pumps it up- the numbers are flashing all over the place, but no reading. It really was trying hard.
5 minutes I sat quietly while she tried to get the machine to focus on something that isn't there.

Then she puts a heart monitor on me !
making sure I have a pulse. I assure her I do.

"well this is just the ... hmm. i wonder... if its the machine.."

nope. its me.

she turns to me and says "ok this is new to me, should i send you to finance first so you can get your estimate? that may get it up there"

oh she's cute. I ask her if she wants some jumping jacks.
nope. she is determined to get this reading.

Not that I have control over it but I sit and stay as quiet and calm as possible- to make it harder for her to say "wow you were right"

she resets the unit again, checks the cuff.

when she turns, I lift my arm up, just a little. (hehe done this before, I have)

the numbers come up.

And as I tried to tell her my blood pressure was remarkably low. (I am awful with numbers, so I don't remember them well, but it was lower than ususal)

She says "holy cow you weren't kidding! that IS low! how do you...feel?"

I answer her, as I do the others. " I'm freezing my arse off"

"i bet you are. wow! I've never known a healthy person to be that low!"
I tell her yea, they don't let me donate blood, just like a high pressure patient.

"no, REALLY?"

ok, coming from a nurse this was scary.
" well yea, If I go to donate blood , for one it would take all day, and then I'd pass out because I can't afford to not have that extra pressure moving through there."

"oh yea.. that makes sense. wow. thats a first for me ! "

haha told ya so !

turns out I probably could have gone to the finance first.

they estimated me WAY more than we expected. and they couldn't find my blood pressure. yea. I'll be going to see someone else, get a lower estimate. (and see how fast they get this blood pressure ;)