One statistic I don't plan to be part of!

I have always found it amusing how people take in their first impressions of me. By appearance, I look much younger than I actually am. The oldest guess so far being 27, almost 10 years off.

Its difficult at times to be taken seriously. For instance ,when I tell people I've worked with children for 20 years, I'm often questioned at length. To those folks who believe I am only 27, it is physically impossible for me to have had much of anything for 20 years.

Recently , I was doing some research for a consult I was asked about. I had gone to the library , and took up residence in the reference department for the day. I had noticed the collection of references didn't have any of the psychology journals or publications i was hoping to find. The librarian was a great help, showing me how to look up those articles in the online system they now use. I was something like a child left alone in a candy store.

Realizing I had limited time for my research, I ditched the online search, for a leisurely browsing on my home time. From there I explored the psychology encyclopedias and texts.

Of course ,I needed to have page copies made, and approached the desk with book 1, and a list of about 4 pages to copy.
The woman at the desk ( there were two) glanced over the pages, and commented on the topic I was studying so intensely.
" wow, this is a pretty big subject here.. You know, they say alot of psychologists commit suicide later in their careers. "

I was a bit flabbergasted by this comment, but replied simply, " I suppose thats understandable, for alot of different reasons"

"well," she says, "good luck with it"

Still a bit baffled, I returned to the table and moved on to the enormous encyclopedia of psychology. I flipped through the pages for another few hours, noting the pages I'd need copied as I went.

When I returned to the desk for the second round of copies, Both women were a bit surprised by how many pages I'd marked.
" That must be one heck of an assignment"

assignment?

"Well to need that much, on THAT topic, you must be doing some kind of thesis assignment. "

I had to laugh. It finally hit me, these two librarians were under the impression I was doing a college paper. I explained to them that I was a consultant, and needed the information for a client's references and resources.

They both looked at me like I was a twelve year old trying to buy booze. "you've GOT to be kidding?"

no, really. I am a consultant, I study child psychology, this information is not for a class, its for a client... here, take my card.

I give them my business card- and before I left caught them browsing my website, comparing the photo on the page to me, in front of them. Both of them looked completely baffled.

"oh my! " one says, " then those ARE your kids you bring in right? "

well, of course they're my kids.

they both laugh again, more of an embarrassed giggle, " ooooh!! we were thinkking those were your younger brother and sister! You don't look old enough to be ....wel, um, to have, ... um..."

Again I laugh, because I'm sure if their feet would reach, they'd be chewing their toes. " Yes, I know, I look fresh out of school. HAHA do you want to see ID?"

we all shared a laugh at that. The first librarian then tells me "Well, good luck to you, but keep in mind what I told you."

Well folks, allow me to assure you now, My psychology studies will not lead me to suicide!
Though as I said, I can understand why this could be.

As a woman who looks too young to know half of what I do, when I explain psychology to people they seem to think I'm making it up as I go.

All of the different zones one topic can enter, can send a person spinning insane in no time. Someone who has studied Psychology can see the reasoning behind many, many behaviors, even when the person doing the behaving seems to have no idea.

I don't believe I will join the 'suicide statistics' , as this study is almost first nature to me. I've always been good at 'figuring it out' - reading people is my thing. I'm able to figure out why a person does what they do, they emotions behind it, and what they will most likely do next. Its honestly almost scary sometimes.

I enjoy it. It drives those around me absolutly batty occasionally, as I try out a new theory or behavioral trick. My husband and children declare they are unwilling guinea pigs. I do my best not to 'experiment ' on them, but there are times when I have to resort to my psych knowledge as a mother in need of a new solution.

I may look young, but I am very much 'lived -in' ,beyond my actual years. This can be frustrating sometimes, but, knowing the 'tricks' ,and a ton of psychology, I can also use it to my advantage.

Never fear- I plan to be around for a long time yet.

My yearly battle

Fall is my favorite time of year. I love the cool crisp air, the birds at the feeders,or migrating overhead, to watch the leaf colors change, to watch the leaves flutter to the ground as if raining color ,and the way the breeze pushes the grounded leaves across the yard or roads...
Its like a free all you can eat buffet for my eyes.

Having lived here 6 years now, On a large property, full of trees ,my eyes feast on the leaf festival.

They feast on the beauty of fall, of watching the leaves dance and flow in all their colors.

Yet, there is also an awful inward cringe, most comparable to a grand mal epileptic seizure.

Why , you ask, would I possibly cringe so horribly at one of my favorite spectacles of nature?

Because, living on a large wooded property, with many many trees, there is an enormous, never ending battle of keeping the leaves under control!

Those who know me well will say I am silly, and somewhat obsessive compulsive about the leaves here. I will not argue that fact. I am. and its atrocious. There IS reasoning behind the obsession though.

** when we go outside, leaves on the walkway and patio tend to get as slick as ice at times.

**the leaves also cluster dangerously near our fire pit.

** when the children go to their playground they are wading through leaves , mid calf, to get to toys they have to literally dig out.

**The leaves pile up against the house, which is heaven for one of my other compulsive behaviors- spiders. said spiders find cozy homes in the leaves against the house, but when it gets too cold, they migrate- into the house.

**I have a cat- an indoor/outdoor cat. This is very convenient, as I have no need for nasty litter boxes. He uses the leaves. This is not the only issue the cat brings to the leaf madness. When its nice and cool out, the cat is a very skilled hunter. he catches a variety of critters, mice, squirrels, small birds. He has his way with them, and stashes them- in the leaves. both of these factors are a true horror when my kids decide they want to play in the leaves.

**we have water drainage routes that get horrible clogged with leaves that get washed into them- when these water routes get too full and it rains really hard, we have a major problem.

So, yes. I have developed a habit as strong as smoking- to rake leaves.
What makes people believe I am insane, we have five acres of treed property.
That is ALOT of leaves people!

In a single day, enough leaves fall to completely cover the playground, and the walkways.
I go out and rake these areas- which, mind you, are large enough to take up to three hours.

within roughly 3 hours of completing the task- these areas are totally covered again.
the next day, i do it again.

on weekends, you may find a crazy sight of a petite woman, 5 feet roughly 110lbs, hunched under the massive weight of a 60 lb leaf blower. Lugging it up and down the slopes of the yard, pushing piles of leaves half as tall as she is, into a ditch area, where the leaves are piled as tall as she is.

Madness ,I tell you.

The fun about the leaf blower- besides the fact it weighs about half what I do, its tortuously loud, yet blows at a rate hard enough to knock a person over- is that because it is so heavy for me, I cannot put it on myself while it is running. and of course, there is no way to start it while on my back. So the blower is reserved for weekends, when there is another adult available , not only to start it up and put it on me, but also to help me get up should I slip on one of the hills . It's a rare event, that I fall, but I've been told I could win the jackpot on America's Funniest Videos, because I have the likeness of a turtle stuck on its back. Very cute.

For that reason, I am usually restricted to use the old fashioned way. The ol trusty rake.
I have become a true Pro at choosing the perfect rakes.
And I have also become a master at wearing the highest "guaranteed-not-to-break" rakes down to the point they break. (I sadly even have a 'rake fund' set aide for the replacement rakes to be bought each year)
We always have a collection of rakes. There are at least 5 available at any time.

Some weekends it is so beautiful out, I'll use the rake just for the exercise.As people come to visit, I get helpers. This is an odd scene as well. Friends will come to visit, most Husbands work pals, and will see me out there raking like a lunatic.
"how hard can it be- she's got alot of work to do... I can knock that area out for her in no time."
Lessons learned very quickly- its NOT as easy as it looks to rake a layer of leaves as high as your knees. It takes much longer than you'd think, and puts a hell of a strain on the body.
Yet these guys try.
I have out-raked groups of muscular, fully grown men in the matter of an hour. And they do NOT get away with this easily.
I get the fun of taunting them.
"are you serious? I'm half your size, a quarter of your weight, and I've been out here all day! you're going to let a cheezy half hour beat you? you WIMP!"
which is usually met with, "yes, I'm a wimp" and a search for Husband with a cold beer.

My children have mini-rakes.
They also take great pride in being able to rake with Mommy.
I don't expect them to last long, as even the mini rake is almost twice the size of my son, but, to be honest, there are some days they last longer than some of the grown men.

a battle it is, yet still amusing.


**note- there will be pictures added to many of these posts soon, I hope to show the true dept of the humor in the insanity I share here..... keep checking back!

my lil tree hugger

I have always taught my children to respect nature, that nature is as living as we are. We have lived in Colorado, where my daughter absorbed the beauty of her birthplace, and now in Tennessee, we live in a wooded area.

Our county has some beautiful trees, they line the roads, the yards. they are super tall and when they change colors in the fall it is truly a painting to see.

Recently our county has begun a road project. A huge project. They will be widening a road that badly needs it. I agree that this project needs to be done, as this road is the only access between my home and town. Its a royal pain.

We started seeing signs of this work, which was an enormous hole cut into a wooded area, which allowed us to see straight through to a road about 3 miles off. wow.
my daughter ,at the time expressed a bit of dismay about all the trees being cut down. I explained to her why it was being done. " But there are SO many trees gone mama!"

yes honey, it sure is a mess right now isn't it.

Yesterday we went to the store, and because we were meeting a friend there, had a short wait. Behind us we watched as a huge chipper pushed trees in one end and out the other end came wood dust. I was fascinated by this huge piece of machinery, much as my son would have been. My daughter was beside me, very quiet, watching as well.

After about two trees had gone through this machine, the huge pile of wood dust as high as the nearby houses, the breeze gently blowing the top across the road- I realize my daughter is quietly sobbing.

"honey whats wrong? why are you crying?"

"because they are killing all those beautiful trees mama! I liked it better with the trees! this is just UGLY!"

Well. she had a point. I, myself have noticed the big gaps, the huge hole, the lushness of these areas being shredded and thinned out.Yet, I also realize that this road project will be a great improvement when finished.(not to mention how much easier my own travels back and forth several times a day will be!)

Her reaction had me desperately searching for an answer to make her feel better.

I explained to her that more trees would grow along the new road, just like they had along the present road. Yes, it may take a while, but things here tend to grow quickly.

Still upset, her next comment reminded me they are studying plant life in her class.

"but mama! we need the trees to make AIR for US! if they cut down all these trees we'll have less AIR!!!"

um. uuuhh... um...

Yes hon, um.. the trees do make our air- but there are still alot of trees left, and more start growing every day! We've cut down trees in our own yard and you haven't been this upset.

"we never cut down so MANY"

oooh yea. another good point.

ok, I'll make you a deal hon, because I can see this is really upsetting you. this spring, when it warms up again, you and I will go to the nurseries and buy a few trees to plant in the yard.

this made her feel much better.

Of course though, I discovered my own 'cons' of the tree shredding, in the same hour.

As we left the store, an enormous, fresh, pine tree was being shoved into the giant tree shredder.
I watched in horror as the dust came out the other side, and gently blew across the road we were about to pass by on.
The horror was due to the fact I am allergic to pine. Even as I realized this was a pine tree, the smell hit me, and my eyes went puffy, my throat got itchy and decidedly smaller-

And my daughter , in the backseat, of course noticed.

"see mama, its bad. you can't breathe already."